The lady who wrote “I hate men”

In august this year, an aspiring French novelist wrote a 96-page book titled “ oi les hommes, je les déteste” which translates into I hate men.

Pauline Harmange, had not expected that her book would be that widely read.But she could thank the advisor to the French Ministry of Equality who spoke about it calling for a legal action for being an incitement to hatred.

While a love for equality for all is deemed feminism, what Pauline practices here is a pure misandry. She inks statistics like 96% domestic violence convicts were men, and 99% of sexual convicts were also men. She also voiced her in-apologeticness of being a misandry citing that it was legitimate given the harm men do to women.

what is the confusion?

I do not conform to the idea of misandry just like misogyny. This may sound offbeat though but few people get the wrong end of the stick. I have been told by some that because I am a feminist, it is spelled out as that I hate all the men in the world! That’s so untrue. One of my friends told me that I should not use the word feminism in my blog because it is construed as a negative sentiment. Now that I call-ignorance!

I am not sure how to put this because I want to be as limpid as I can be at manifesting my thoughts. I am a feminist, and it is not a negative emotion. Like many, I flout the idea of gender-based discrimination, sexism, and ultimately-hatred.

For long, women have been seen as a secondary and submissive sex, and this idea deprives us of respect in general. It is deleterious to the dignity of a person. She, who is the bearer of humanity, has strong moral composure, is adorable-looking, she does not deserve a secondary status! She deserves to live a life without being tutored all the time.

But Why this hatred anyway!

Even though I believe in equality for women’s rights but it nowhere and in no way implies misandry. I do not hate men! Infact, no true feminist would say that. Ofcourse, life has different stories for all but hating men universally would serve no good as well. We are not haters, we are denouncers of suppression.

Like writer Pauline in her instagram bio mentions herself as ‘harbinger of feminism’, I personally do not think it is that way. Feminism and misandry are not ally though they may seem so. There is though a thin, but a fine line.

Men are really cool creatures too!

There are men who assert on inferiority of women. They may think that women belong to the bedroom and kitchen like the Tennis player Bobby Riggs had once commented. Such men are that part of our society that needs attitude brushing, brain polishing, and sometimes defenestration from life.

However, a holistic look could help us see many good men who also advocated feminism. They, who have fought for what was righteous. We know men like :

Guru Nanak-Founder of Sikhism

Guru Nanak’s words resonate sharply with this basic description of humanity that says if there was no woman, there would be no kings!

Mahatma Gandhi-Iconic leader of freedom struggle of India

Gandhi has not only inspired the world with his teachings of truth and non-violence, he also advocated that there is nothing more degrading or brutal as is the abuse of women.

John Legend — Singer

We love him for what he said!

“All men should be feminists. If men care about women’s rights, the world will be a better place. We are better off when women are empowered — it leads to a better society,” said Legend before performing with Global Citizen partner CHIME FOR CHANGE at their concert in 2013.

Barack Obama-Former President of the United States of America

We respect him for his feminist maneuvers!

“So we need to break through these limitations. We need to keep changing the attitude that raises our girls to be demure and our boys to be assertive, that criticizes our daughters for speaking out and our sons for shedding a tear. We need to keep changing the attitude that punishes women for their sexuality and rewards men for theirs.”

There are thousands of examples of men like these who are feminists, and we cannot hate them for just being men!

The men in my life

I have always been grateful for all I have in life especially the people. I have overtly been pampered by my father, have had insensible altercations and brawls with my brother, laughed my head off with my friends, learnt from some amazing teachers, been loved by the husband who also plays all the above roles apart from surprising me on different occasions with his innovative ways just to make me look like a fool!

Anyways, what I intend to throw light on is that all women who are feminists do not hate men (exceptions are there) ,they just hate those who regard themselves as superior and women as inferior. They disregard those who do injustice to women even if that person is a ‘woman herself’!

In this world, men and women have equal rights and roles to play, none is above the another.

Pauline has her own view of the world and its people and it must be acceptable. She has the right to feel whatever she wants.

But According to me, Hatred should not be for humanity, but for the cruel acts that degrade them to beasts.

Originally published at https://fortunemistress.com on October 12, 2020.